Thursday, August 14, 2008

Feeling Calm

Today I can say I feel calm. My home is much more peaceful now. We are not so annoyed with our small fridge. I do love to cook and now I can do that. It was nice to be able to buy a big watermelon and have some yesterday. I kept seeing the watermelons at the store and wanted one, but we didn't have the space in our little dorm fridge to keep one.

Now I am not just feeling calm because of the fridge. I am feeling calm now because I am "choosing" to feel that way. I am really getting tired of always getting so upset about many things. I am going to try and have a goal of not reacting so much to people and their b.s. I think I am bottoming out on peoples weird or rude behavior. I am also tired of me getting so upset when other people do dumb stuff. I am "not" the one who did the dumb thing, so I need to stop feeling bad about it. I am not the one who did the "rude" behavior, so I need to stop feeling bad about it.

I am going to try and let go more and more of "other peoples stuff". I think it will be much easier living for me and I could wind up feeling more calm and not so aggravated, too. I think I am such a people watcher that I do pick up on whether people are acting correctly or not.

Or maybe my mom did put this "right and wrong" thing into my head. And if I see someone doing something wrong, I really have a strong urge to point it out to them, but I don't point it out, I just seem to storm inside. Well, I am really tired of the storming inside. So I am going to choose for today to let go of other peoples stuff. And I want to try this for one week and see if it makes a difference in me feeling calm. I just woke up and am the only one awake. It is peaceful and quiet. I want to carry on that peace throughout the day. I know it is hard to change the world and the people in the world, but we can make efforts to change ourselves and be peaceful people. So that is my current goal - don't freak out all the time and be peaceful and calm. Luckily the day is starting out calm, so I am happy for that.

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